Wow.  What a weekend.  It was running over with homework for grad school.  Not my idea of fun or relaxation, let me just make clear.  However, there were a couple of bright spots on Sunday.  Gathering with the rest of the congregation at Saint Patrick's to hear the Word, pray and gather around the Table was just what I needed.  On top of that, Abbot Andrew Counts and his wife Cindy joined us for worship and met with rest of the Company of Jesus folks from our area over dinner.  I especially appreciated the fact that he brought a whole box full of books on monastic life and we all got to pick a few to borrow.  I selected two books to read:

• Benedictine Monasticism:  Its Formation and Development Through the 12th Century by Lowrie J. Daly, S.J.

• Lives of the Trappists Today by Frank Bianco

I'm looking forward to reading both of these books.  Anyone else familiar with them?

I know, I know, you think the title is referring to yours truly, don't you?  Well, not quite.

I ran across this blog today and really like what I'm reading.  It's called Young, Evangelical, and Catholic.  Good stuff.  I particularly like these two posts:

• The Disembodied Gospel:  Ordinances versus Sacraments
• The Disembodied Gospel:  Screens in Church

Check it out for yourself.

O gracious God, we remember before you today your servant and apostle James, first among the Twelve to suffer martyrdom for the name of Jesus Christ; and we pray that you will pour out upon the leaders of your Church that spirit of self-denying service by which alone they have have true authority among your people; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever.  Amen. (Book of Common Prayer)

O God, the protector of all who trust in you, without whom nothing is strong, nothing is holy: Increase and multiply upon us your mercy; that, with you as our ruler and guide, we may so pass through things temporal, that we lose not the things eternal; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen. (From the BCP, '79 edition)

O GOD, whose never-failing providence ordereth all things both in heaven and earth; We humbly beseech thee to put away from us all hurtful things, and to give us those things which are profitable for us; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. (From the BCP, '28 edition)

Monastics ought to be zealous for silence at all times, but especially during the hours of the night.

That was today's reading from the Rule of St. Benedict.  The first part of the sentence is not surprising at all.  For those in the monastic life, silence should be a regular part of their daily life.  However, the last part of the sentence caught my attention, "but especially during the hours of the night."  On the surface, it's clear that Benedict expects those living in the monastery to preserve the "Grand Silence" that begins after compline.  But, I wonder if Benedict's experience mimics my own?  Here's what I mean.

There have been numerous times when the old insomnia monster raises his ugly head and I've found myself unable to sleep around 2 or 3 a.m.  I used to lay there and try to go to sleep.  That doesn't work too well, as you probably know.  I would end up tossing and turning and turning and tossing and only end up more awake than ever.  Now when that happens, I just get up and I often make my way into the other room where a couple of my icons are and an oil lamp.  I light the lamp and sit in silence.  More often than not, I open my prayer book and begin to pray vigils.  You know what I've discovered over the last few years?  God often meets me there in the silence.  There's a palpable silence at that time of night that I don't experience at any other time and sometimes God chooses to meet me there in the silence.

Does God use the silence to speak to me or does the silence just provide the right space for me to listen?  I'm not sure.  I just know what has happened in the past and I know that I sometimes long for that silence.

On a side note, I was listening to a podcast by Frederica Mathewes-Green this week and she shared about her regular habit of rising during the middle of the night to pray the Jesus Prayer.  Evidently, she's had this routine for years, since her children were babies.  She just never has stopped getting up during the middle of the night to pray.

The Psalmist says it well in Psalm 119:  "At midnight I will rise to give you thanks, because of your righteous judgments."

Where they see the blood of Christ, demons flee, while angels gather.  (John Chrysostom)

The Eucharist regularly moves me.  I’m not sure how many hundreds/thousands of time I’ve received the Eucharist at this point in my life, but I am still in awe of this weekly sacrament where I get to go meet Jesus at His table.  Me, Jesus, the communion of saints, angels (and archangels) . . . somehow, we all get to gather around the Table and share a meal together.  What a beautiful thing.

One of my friends from the Company of Jesus shared a portion of the Invocation from the 1928 BCP with me this morning.  I've included it below along with the rest of that section.  Listen to the language.

And we earnestly desire thy fatherly goodness, mercifully to accept this our sacrifice of praise and thanksgiving; most humbly beseeching thee to grant that, by the merits and death of thy Son Jesus Christ, and through faith in his blood, we, and all thy whole Church, may obtain remission of our sins, and all other benefits of his passion.  And here we offer and present unto thee, O Lord, our selves, our souls and bodies, to be a reasonable, holy, and living sacrifice unto thee; humbly beseeching thee, that we, and all others who shall be partakers of this Holy Communion, may worthily receive the most precious Body and Blood of thy Son Jesus Christ, be filled with thy grace and heavenly benediction, and made one body with him, that he may dwell in us, and we in him.  And although we are unworthy, through our manifold sins, to offer unto thee any sacrifice; yet we beseech thee to accept this our bounden duty and service; not weighing our merits, but pardoning our offences, through Jesus Christ our Lord; by whom, and with whom, in the unity of the Holy Ghost, all honour and glory be unto thee, O Father Almighty, world without end.  Amen.